Lingminging's Handbook to world domination

"Does power corrupt? Absolutely! Does the hunger and lust for absolute power course through your icy blue veins? Do you feel the need to rule the world with an iron fist? To subjugate the masses with a whimsical snap of your fingers? To rise above the insolent and unworthy with your superior intelligence and unlimited supply of cold hard cash? Have you ever wondered if there was a simple step-by-step guide for following your impulses and instincts toward world domination? You’ve come to the right place. Here is the opportunity of a lifetime—the chance to turn your sociopathic needs into bloodthirsty greed! Now you can learn at the feet of the Master of Megalomania . . . ! Don’t just stand there, you sniveling slugabed. Purchase this portable periodical posthaste and leave your conscience at the cash register!"